Chronicles of a Young Wife: Bed Sharing

My parents bought baby his first and only cradle,

complete with bassinet, hanging toys

 and mosquito net.

We also used this as his play pen for several months too

i love the details

and I let him sleep here during the day while I do my household chores, and design jobs

P.S. – I only let Pengel lay beside him for this photo. Never attempt to pile pillows to avoid SIDS.

But for the past two years, this is our scenario during the night,

This is my night life.

How to be baby-safe during bed sharing?

Tips below were my favorites:

  • Bottle-feeding babies should always sleep alongside the mother on a separate surface rather than in the bed.
  • If bed-sharing, ideally, both parents should agree and feel comfortable with the decision. Each bed-sharer should agree that he or she is equally responsible for the infant and acknowledge that the infant is present. My feeling is that both parents should think of themselves as primary caregivers.
  • Infants a year or less should not sleep with other children siblings — but always with a person who can take responsibility for the infant being there;
  • Persons on sedatives, medications or drugs, or is intoxicated – -or excessively unable to arouse should not cosleep on the same surface with the infant.
  • Excessively long hair on the mother should be tied up to prevent infant entanglement around the infant’s neck — (yes, it has really happened!)
  • Extremely obese persons, who may not feel where exactly or how close their infant is, may wish to have the infant sleep alongside but on a different surface.
  • It is important to realize that the physical and social conditions under which infant-parent cosleeping occur, in all it’s diverse forms, can and will determine the risks or benefits of this behavior. What goes on in bed is what matters.
  • It may be important to consider or reflect on whether you would think that you suffocated your baby if, under the most unlikely scenario, your baby died from SIDS while in your bed. Just as babies can die from SIDS in a risk free solitary sleep environment, it remains possible for a baby to die in a risk-free cosleeping/bed sharing environment. Just make sure, as much as this is possible, that you would not assume that , if the baby died, that either you or your spouse would think that bed-sharing contributed to the death, or that one of your really suffocated (by accident) the infant. It is worth thinking about.

More about co-sleeping here.

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